Pammy gone wild
[TITLE CARD: "COFFEE TIME"]
Coffee time*! [Laughs] Okay, so it's post-lunch, we've been shopping, got the girls some stuff for the bat mitzvah, so why am I chattin' on you now? Interesting subject came up over lunch, which was, the mandatory vaccination against cervical cancer. Which I'm totally against, by the way – as a parent, I make those choices. Secondly, why this vaccine? Why now? Because girls tend to be, have multiple sexual lovers? And they need it because their, your increased multiple sexual lovers increases your chances of cervical cancer? This is…this is more of a left-tarded indoctrination. (A), we should be teaching that a girl doesn't give it away. Doesn't give it away! Unless it's love! (B), it's, it…someone validating that multiple sexual lovers is a good thing.
[TITLE CARD: "Cervical Cancer Is not even an INFECTIOUS disease."**]
You're validating that, are you not? You're validating sexual lovers, uh, many sexual lovers is a good thing, and that…not…yeah, that it's an okay thing. What…well, we'll give you a vaccine to stop you from getting cancer. Why this disease? Why now? And another thing I want to ask you. This…in my generation, the sexually liberated generation [snaps fingers and does go-go dance] where you fucked everybody, no AIDS, no nothing. Not me, the proverbial me. Because I didn't, trust me. Um, my question is, so all these women at school, everybody in town, what's the incidence of cervical cancer at now? One in one hundred thousand, two hundred thousand, what?*** Is this in reason that we have to mandate every young girl to get a vaccine against cervical cancer? I'm totally against this. I don't know why this disease, why now. Part of the left-wing indoctrination. It's wrong, and that's why I'm coming to you live from the Big D's, Dunkin Donuts.
[TITLE CARD: "later that day"]
So now you have a few of the folks say 'But the Republicans went to Syria! The Republicans were there!' First of all, what Republicans? Who were they? What nameless faces were they?**** They were not the most powerful woman in the world. 'I am the most powerful woman in the world!' Remember that? 'I am the most powerful woman in the world.' And if I go to Syria – who's gonna give a rat's ass if I go to Syria? Let's be honest, okay? Um…look how they copy our, 'but the Republicans did it! Waaaah!' They can't even stand up f…can't even stand up for what they do. Can't even stand up for their own positions. So now you have Nancy Peloopsi in Syria, you have Sestak last night at the CAIR fundraiser, raising money for CAIR. Raising money for a front for terror. This is the Democratic Party. Can I ask you something? Why do we…I…'We have to engage, we have to engage with the terrorists!' Did we engage with the Nazis? And how come they're not engaging with George Bush? How come they're not…
[TITLE CARD: "Would the dhimmicrats 'engage' with the Nazis too?"]
What is George Bush guilty of, trying to keep us free? What is George Bush guilty of, trying to institute the tr…the Bush Doctrine? Trying to free a part of the world that has been living in totalitarian regimes for centuries? What is he guilty of, trying to keep the American people safe? Which, by the way, I have to say, since his election…since 9/11, he's done an outstanding job. Outstanding, my friends. That's why you're all so complacent, and you're feeling so good in your fat beds, in your feather beds with your ducks and, uh, p…p….p…mattresses! You don't even know you're at war. They're plotting and champing and chopping with their bombs and their small bombs and big bombs and polonium-210 and they're smuggling it in, and the guy died, the guy died from a $15 million dose.
[TITLE CARD: "Alexander Litvinenko"]
That wasn't an assassination attempt by Putin. Why spend fifteen to thirty million dollars on one tiny granule of polonium-210 when a bullet costs you a nickel? They were smuggling that stuff! [sings] Good morning, America, how are you?' Anyway, I'm down south with my kids, it's Spring Break, whoo whoo! Let's all dance!
[TITLE CARD: "yeah bababy"]
And I'm having a blast. I can't watch the news. You know I went from, when I started this blog I went from…it's the unreported news, I have to get the truth to the people, they have to see what's really going on, the, they…the mainstream media has abdicated its role as public servant to the, disseminating the information. I've gone from that to feeling like, frankly, I'm giving you the blow-by-blow. I'm giving you the play-by-play on the road to Armageddon. Jackie, you ready for lunch?
[Off-screen voice: "Yep."
Okay! We're going for American lunch! No problems! Don't worry, be happy! Don't worry, be happy! Nancy Pelosi's in Syria, it's all good! See ya.
"I will destroy you!"
BONUS SPECIAL EXTRA DRUNK PAMMY V-BLOG!
[TITLE CARD: "How the Left promotes Teenage Promiscuity – Pamela – AtlasShrugs.com"]
Okay, the reason I was so upset about that vaccine, uh, for cervical cancer is because first of all, they want to give it to, uh, middle-school students. Nine-year-olds, ten-year-olds, eleven-year-olds. I'm in Florida and they're talking about making it law now. [Points to her daughter] Could you see this one with a cervical cancer vaccine*****? I'm…I mean, seriously, okay? And I say, why this…I say, why this disease, why now? Why this disease? It's not infectious. It's not typhoid, right******? Oh, she's putting on a happy face now. Okay, so earlier, I went to the store, and this guy comes up to me, and he's all like, do I know you? Ha ha ha ha. I said, New, New York? He goes, no. I say, you get any news on the net? He says, Atlas Shrugs, right? Right? Yeah, baby! Oh, oh, uhn uh uh. Okay. So anyway, on that note, um, oh! Oh! Uh, who, who, who's with me on arresting Pelosi? On, on the Logan Act? Who's with me?
[Pam's daughters, off-screen: "Me! Me! Me!"]
Okay, I got my posse with me. I got my posse, and we're gonna arrest Pelosi, and, and that other one! What was that, with the nostrils? Who's Nostril Boy?
[TITLE CARD: I don't know what the hell this thing is.]
We need some names. Nostril Boy…Waxman. Henry Waxman. Yes. And who are you? Meeting with the Muslim Brotherhood? The Muslim Brotherhood is their…oh, rrrrrrrrrrr, my ride is here, I gotta go. The Muslim Brotherhood is…okay, stop it, I'm coming. The Muslim Brotherhood are….[next sentence rendered blissfully inaudible by passing motorcycles] It's all very distressing, and, uh, okay, take your, uh, you know, I think it's too dark now. I love you.
[TITLE CARD: "WHAT WAS SAN FRAN NAN DOING IN SYRIA?" Judging from the incomprehensible image, she was being anally violated by a young Prince Charles.]
*: Actually, "cwawfee towime", but you get the picture.
**: I don't suppose it's even necessary at this point to mention that Crazy Pammy doesn't know what she's talking about.
***: One in 30,000, actually, with over four thousand fatalities a year in the United States. Much higher than your risk of death by Islamofascism!
****: Among others, Arlen Specter (R-PA), Darrell Issa (R-CA), Frank Wolf (R-VA), Bob Aderholt (R-AL), , and David Hobson (R-OH), who was actually with Pelosi on her trip. Jeez, Pam, when you sober up, ask someone what Google is.
*****: Could you see this one with a fatal case of cervical cancer because her mother was a crazy drunk who refused to let her get vaccinated to avoid left-wing indoctrination?
******: From 1996-1999, over 15,000 American women died of cervical cancer. During the same period, one person died of typhoid. Typhoid, by the way, was almost entirely eliminated in the West due to a government program to vaccinate children against it.