Ukrainiac

Hello, legions of fans! Did you miss me? I know I missed myself!

Seattle was pantloads of fun, but I'm afraid four days of exposure to hardcore music geekery left me somewhat out of the loop, current-events-wise. I did take a few moments to discover that Crazy Pammy at Atlas Shrugs deletes comments she can't think of a good response to, but beyond that, I have only word-of-mouth about what America's crazy-thinkers have been up to the last week or so. My understanding is that a lot of people said a lot of stupid things about a lot of dead people, resulting in a lot of self-serving, hypocritical nonsense.

But hey, that's in the PAST, man! VA Tech is OVER and except for lumping Koreans in with Iranians, Arabs and any Negroes not wearing a t-shirt as "People We Should Be Concerned About Having to Sit Next To", nothing has changed, or needs to change. Let's focus on the NOW. And NOW, we're...uh...still thinking up crazy crap to say about the VA Tech massacre! Yes, over at Big Boy Jammies, everyone's favorite raving paranoid post-Soviet graphic designer, Oleg Atabatshit (who previously wrote that picking John as your favorite Beatle over Paul was the reason for the decline of Western civilization), posts that the blame for the worst shooting spree in American history can be laid squarely at the feet of our old enemies: progressive liberalism, Che Guevara, and, uh, oh, let's say Michael Moore.

Look, Oleg, I was a punk rocker: I know what it's like to hate hippies. But come on, man, we've got bigger fish to fry these days. And implying that any attempt to address poverty will inevitably lead to widespread homicidal sprees makes you sound like an even dumber version of Ayn Rand. I realize you guys are having a grand old time trying to think up a reason to blame this mindless act on everything you've ever hated (I mean, come on, fellas -- we're a week out and no Bill Clinton connection yet?), but isn't there a war on or something?