Do Russians love their children too?

April Fool's Day has come early at Killing an Arab! Even though past experience teaches that the commenters at LGF can't go five seconds without hoping that we nuke Mecca, that hilarious jokester Chuckles Johnson has us on by pretending that kind of thing is an abberation. It's all part of a fun new April Fool's Day joke-meme that's sweeping the right-wing-blog nation, where they pretend that left-wing blogs are full of foul-mouthed, disgusting, bloodthirsty creeps, while the conservative blogs are peopled by gentle, loving saints who would never, for example, call for a constitutional amendment to ban Islam or imply that a teenager would prefer to die in a car crash than grow up alongside a fruity-seeming father.

Now, Chuck has always had a very subtle sense of humor, and you might not know he was kidding just by noting that, in other posts this week, he calls Islam a "death cult", mocks the death of Rachel Corrie for the ten millionth time, and uses sure-fire punchline words like "disgusting", "ominous", "obnoxious", "violently bigoted", "disgraceful", "nihilistic", "debased", and "evil" to crack hilarious jokes about people who don't agree with him. But here's how you can tell it's all just a big prank: immediately after this post, there's another post about how Elizabeth Edwards has cancer. And while no one wishes for her to die (since she's not running for anything), that "tiniest of tiny fractions" of troublemakers -- who are, of course, immediately shouted down by their higher-minded peers -- does have a few things to say about her husband:

- "disgusting"
- "a jerk"
- "an idiot" (first three posts)
- "sad"
- "continual disgust for him"
- "disgusting"
- "speaks badly of him"
- "his vanity and ego are going to rob them all of what time she has left"
- "I doubt a lot of this sincerity from the nutroots"
- "his priorities are skewed"
- "If he really cared, he would drop outta the race"
- "the libs are thinking we're just being nice to make them look bad"
- "misguided"
- "a cad"
- "it goes to show what kind of decision maker Johnny Breck is"
- "idiot"
- "a slug"
- "a black hole of greed and ambition"
- "people are mouthing platitudes that they don't really feel at all"
- "fucking tool"
- "shallow"
- "impressing very few people, I fear"
- "milking this"
- "making an attention-whoring parade out of it"
- "I still cannot stand her husband"
- "There are Two Americas: The America that stands by its family and loved ones, and the America that lusts for power"
- "She has much Class, he, however, does not"
- "i don't think it's coincidence that in every liberal marriage the wife is the dominant partner"
- "disingenuous"
- "despicable to the nth degree...a cold blooded bastard"
- "he's in some way trying to milk this for political gain"
- "condescending"
- "I have no pity or sympathy...these people are destroying the last refuge of freedom on the earth"
- "Edwards is putting himself before his wife"
- "a complete tool"
- "psychopath"
- "ludicrous"
- "pathological narcissist"
- "I don't trust him as far as I could throw him"
- "piece of shit"
- "a creep and an opportunist of the highest order"
- "the living definition of a charlatan"
- "I wouldn't call [Elizabeth Edwards] warm, caring, or particularly fair...she's no angel and a rabid leftie"
- "politically retarded...sleaze-ball"
- "such men...would sell the gold teeth out of their dead mother's mouths"
- "I cannot hope or pray for a man I despise"
- "I lost all sympathy for him when I heard his comments today"

Then there's this high-larious bit of unintentional irony:

I just had it out with my moonbat bro who tried to make a moral equivalence between conservative and liberal blogs. I told him 99.9% of gutter and hate talk comes from their side. Vicious anarchist assholes they are.

...aaaaaaaaand, just so you don't think the exterminate-the-brutes crowd can't find some way of blaming absolutely everything on the Muslims, there's these two:

"Cancer is the real enemy of mankind. I wish the muslims would learn that."

"This makes me hate the Islamofacists even more. The money we have to spend fighting their evil death cult could be available instead for research to find cures that give people life."



Doodle Bean said...

You are a gem, Leonard!





Eryk Nielsen said...

I've got to stop following those links.. the sheer spiteful meanness of these guys is more than I can handle. It's like they're wearing a black t-shirt that says "I hate everyone's mom" on it, with a lapel pin that says "Sex has passed me by."

Are they utter assholes in person, too, or is blogging just their therapy?