Poor little naughty girl

Via the ever-sassy Bradley No, we learn that the Naughty Girl (who, yesterday, was creaming her jeans about Professor Poopypants' revelation that hard-rockin' superstars Five for Fighting are fans of right-wing Bluto-intellectual Viktor Davis Hanson) has received an adoring mash note from the Washington Post's Howard Kurtz. Sure, dear readers, you might think Michelle Malkin is a horrible, despicable human being who makes her living mau-mauing anyone whose politics are even at slight variance with her own, but in fact, she is a lonely, sad little girl who has had to suffer deprivations and persecutions that you are probably totally incapable of understanding. Why, just look at what the poor thing has had to live through!

Michelle Malkin has seen her head electronically grafted onto a photo of a bikini-clad body.

OH NOES! That's as bad as being imprisoned in a Japanese-American internment camp! Luckily, our little trouper has been able to ease her pain by constantly using Photoshop mockery of her own on her Hot Air v-casts.

She had to cancel a Berkeley book signing in the face of 200 shouting protesters.

OH NOES! Protestors? Against Michelle Malkin? What is this world coming to? Lousy democracy!

YouTube banned one of her videos.

OH NOES! YouTube banning one of your videos is a thousand times worse than the Siberian gulags, Sobibor and the Black Hole of Calcutta put together!

And she felt compelled to move after critics posted online her Gaithersburg area address and pictures of her home.

OH NOES! Of course, this only happened as retaliation for Malkin having published the address, phone number and contact information of some college students whose viewpoints she disagreed with (and which resulted in dozens of death threats from her readers to the students), but that's beside the point! No matter how many times the Naughty Girl uses other peoples' personal information as part of an ideological attack plan, no matter how many times her own readers make death threats against the people she declares the enemy, no matter even if her actions might have actually exacerbated the conditions that led to someone's suicide or actually leads to domestic terrorism, the important thing to remember is, it's not her fault, and using her own techniques against her is absolutely beyond the pale.

Malkin tells it like it is: all the attacks on her are really about racism.

"Particularly when you're a minority conservative," she says, "you get a lot of ugly, hysterical, unhinged attacks, because you're challenging so many liberal myths about what people of color should think."

True enough, some people do believe the myth that people of color shouldn't be virulent racists, that Asian-Americans shouldn't write books defending Japanese-American internment camps, and that "anchor baby" daughters of immigrants shouldn't be so quick to constantly condemn immigrants who have "anchor babies". But that doesn't excuse the fact that one out of a hundred comments on liberal blogs sometimes call her a "gook" or a "slanty"; that's the sort of unspeakable vileness that you never see in right-wing blogs, and certainly never on Michelle's own website.

After a few liberal sites posted her home address and phone numbers last year, Malkin received a wave of harassing calls. She responded with a defiant post, headlined "I AM NOT AFRAID OF YOU." Malkin and her family have moved elsewhere in Maryland.

"No one likes to receive the kind of attacks she gets," [Malkin's business partner] Preston says. "She has had to take some security precautions to make sure it doesn't rise to the level of threatening her family."

Moving to a different house might seem like the actions of someone who is afraid, but in reality, she was just taking precautions against the possibilty that someday someone will threaten her family, which hasn't happened yet, but you never know.

"You have to accept that you'll never have many friends," Malkin says. "It's a lonely existence."

FEEL SORRY FOR HER, READERS. I COMMAND IT.